If my staff has sent you a link to this post, read it, learn it, and internalize it, because it will prevent a whole lot of heartache down the road.  I say this with as much tough love as I can can muster, because in a few weeks, you will freak out, you will call or email me, and I will tell you to sit down and relax.

Relax.

DAMMIT, RELAX.  I’M NOT KIDDING. 

YOU’RE DONE.

We’re now on file with a foreign authority, and you must manage your client’s expectations down the road.  Far down the road.  Must.  Not should or could.

Believe me, we’re not slacking here at Viking Advocates.  We’re not shirking our duty, because if we’ve sent you this, our job is done.  Period, end of story.

Now all we can do… is wait.

The most frequent question to hit my inbox in any given week is “hey, Aaron, any update yet?”  In 99% of cases, the answer is no, because we’re just waiting on a foreign government to get back to us– and when we know, you’ll know.  If you haven’t heard from us, it’s because we haven’t heard from the actual foreign authorities we rely on to finish the job.  Sometimes we field the question mere weeks after we submit a Request package to an overseas Central Authority, sometimes it’s a year down the road.  But the answer is still the same:

No.

I hate leaving it at that.  The situation is entirely outside our control (“our” meaning my client’s control or mine) and all we can do is wait.  The litigant is breathing down my client’s neck, or (worse) the judge is breathing down my client’s neck… still no.  But a simple “No” answer is just too abrupt, and “not yet” doesn’t paint a sufficient picture.  I usually end up sending links to several past blog posts in the hope that they’ll offer some solace and perspective on an otherwise uncontrollable situation.

The posts I don’t send in those messages are a little harshly titled, but frankly, they have to be harsh in order to stress the magnitude of differences between the way we do things here in the U.S. and Canada and the way things are done everywhere else.

This is also harsh, and perhaps overly blunt, but for crying out loud, GET OUT OF YOUR AMERICAN LAWYER HEAD.

Seriously, get over the idea that a United States District Judge has the authority to tell a judge or bureaucrat in another country what to do.  Just stop it.  You must face reality.

Sure, you already get that.  But so must your judge and so must your client.  Tell them to just stop it.