[Yes, this story is relevant to litigation. I promise.]
Between us, Peggy and I have four nephews– three by biology and another by circumstance of life. All four of them are on the verge of adulthood, and all four played a lot of Minecraft when they were on the verge of adolescence. I mean a LOT of Minecraft. No, really– we’re talking freaky amounts of time playing this game that only makes me want to go lay down so my head will stop spinning.
I didn’t realize just how deep they were into the abyss until I noticed one of them watching YouTube videos of OTHER KIDS playing Minecraft.
“Hey, whatcha watchin’?”
Minecraft.
“I thought that was something you played. Y’know, like Atari?” *
Go away, old man.
“So… you’re watching Minecraft instead of playing Minecraft?”
Yes. Go away.
“You’re watching some other dweeb play the game that you yourself play.”
Yes. Go away.
[What can I say? He was surly at 12. And a dweeb. He’s still a tad surly at 20, but I’m proud of the man that he’s become, regardless.]
“I don’t get it, D. Why would you watch some other… forget it.” As I walked away, shaking my head.
You know a video game is addictive when a kid watches somebody else play it. For hours.
Now into court comes a parade of parents, suing the makers of various video game platforms for failure to warn them of the dangers posed by the likes of Minecraft, Fortnite, Roblox… all far more sophisticated and intricate than anything we could have imagined back in 1980 when they told us that Pac Man would rot our brains by 1982.
It’s the sophistication than puts parents at a disadvantage; the games are designed like Vegas casinos. No clocks, no natural light, no sense of the passage of time, all so the player stays in it. There’s a reason we don’t let seventh-graders play slots. And yet…
So who came up with Minecraft? An outfit called Mojang Studios, now a Microsoft subsidiary and Microsoft’s co-defendant in dozens (if not hundreds) of suits nationwide. If it’s going to be sued, it’s also going to have to be served, and that’s where the Hague Service Convention meets Jason Momoa.
See, Mojang AB (Aktiebolag) is a Swedish company, parked in a lovely little three-story building facing a sinister cliff face in Stockholm (this is the cliff— and now it all makes sense). Sue Mojang in Tampa or Omaha or Denver, you still have to serve it in Stockholm. See here for a rundown on how to do that.
Or just look up at the upper right hand corner of this screen (scroll all the way down if you’re on a phone) and tap us on the shoulder.
* In case there was doubt, I am Atari 2600 Old. And I was an ace at River Raid.